Thursday, March 23, 2017

An Open Response To The Working Mom From The SAHM

Being a mom is the most precious gift of god. It is a feeling that is unimaginably precious. And enjoying this motherhood journey brings true joy and satisfaction in our life. But as a human tendency, we never skip a chance to make a simpler thing to complicate. And tag moms as a “stay at home mom” or “working mom” is a common debate that often give a bitter taste in our mouth. It creates an unpleasant scenario that starts an unnecessary debate to the beautiful journey of motherhood.

 As the ongoing fight between stay at home and the working mom is a common occurrence in our society. And all women (both stay at home mom and working mom) had faced an issue of being judged by one another, time to time.

 Personally, I believed it is totally an individual choice, her opinion and a mutual arrangement of any one’s family to be a stay at home mom or working mom. There is no need to interfere someone else to being judgemental about this personal choice. And everyone has a complete right to make her choice with great pride, but unfortunately, it did not happen all time. I had a personal experience regarding this issue, which I would love to share with you all.

It was 2 years ago when I met with women through a common friend. She was a working mom (full time, work in an IT sector) and we became good friends after few meetup. Since the beginning, she was surprised with my decision as being a stay at home mom in spite being a gold medallist in homoeopathy. She has asked me few times about it, but I had not paid any serious attention to her thoughts for avoiding any harsh arguments.

Most of the time, she used to visit my home after returning from her job. She has only one son, and she sent him to daycare since he was 3 months old. She always had great pride about her decision with a repeated thought that “I love my job, I can not waste my whole day by doing the same things repeatedly”, and still I used to ignore her over pride statements by keeping a thought that it is her life and she has a right to live it my choice.

One day when she came routinely to my home after her office with a typically exhausted look, she has crossed all the boundaries. As it was the time of summer vacation and we (I and my both daughters) were busy in crafting. We love crafting as a family and whenever my dolls get bored I used to do some creative crafting projects, to keep them entertain and to raise their creative quotients. And as usual, on that day, we had made some cute cardboard crafts. As soon as she has entered my house, my dolls had shown their crafts with great enthusiasm. Both were looking towards her for getting a bit of appreciation from her. She has passed a cunning smile…and then move towards me with nasty remarks “Oh! You had wasted this day by doing this foolish thing”. And again I had avoided her disgusting remark to make it more complicated.

Next day, I was busy in preparation of dinner. And I was cutting vegetables and other things related to cooking. And then she came and told me, “Oh! Again the same thing…you did not get bored doing same things, I hate to do all this. My husband handles all these cooking responsibilities”. You are a highly qualified person, why are you wasting your life? And this time, my anger was on top of the world. I was terribly irritated by her being judgemental, negative remarks. I had explained her few things with due respect. And very soon, I had ended my friendship with her because of her mentality.

 I would love to share my answers with all that I had given to this working mom who called me “Spoiled” for being a stay at home mom. I am not saying that all working mothers are like her. But if any of you had thoughts like her, please listen,

  • ·         We are not lazy, indolent persons, who do not want work nor had an aversion to work out side. It is just about a priority and an individual choice. Personally I believed, managing home and raising kids is not a mechanical thing, it is equally important to earn money.
  • ·         We are not a person who does not have any opinion, thoughts or individuality. We also had the same qualities, qualifications and capabilities. And we want to use them to take care of our home and nurturing our kids.
  • ·         We are not a person who do same thing repeatedly (cooking), we believed it is equally important to serve a healthy, good quality food to our family to keep them healthy. If you did not think like that, it is all right. But do not judge us for our choices.
  • ·         We are not a person who is totally dependent on our husband and not supporting them in any way. If you supporting them by financially then we are supporting them by handling all house hold responsibilities so well.
  • ·         We are not person, who believed that raising kids can be easiest thing by putting them in day care (not for all working women. I know most of them are so good in all) but for us spending time with kids, cherish the tiny moment of their childhood is equally rewarded as getting a salary or promotion at the end of the month.
  • ·         We are not a person who is not qualitative; we can do excel in every field, if we open our wings.
  • ·         Last but not the least,

“We all are women, we all are moms, we all love our family, and we all are supporting our families by doing our best efforts. It is just a matter of choice, choosing a different path to support our families, and nurturing our kids in different parenting style

So please stop judging, respect womanhood, motherhood. Live your life and let live others them their life. 

Sunday, March 5, 2017

My Salute to this Brave girl...A 17 Year old Girl Cuts the penis Of Rapist...



We lived in an unpredictable world. Everyday stories of varied crimes (terrorist attack, murders, robberies, assaults, thefts) make us anxious and insecure with a sense of fear and anxiety. And as the nation’s crime rate is continuing to climb sharply in the case of some crimes, put us in a situation of frustration and helplessness.

Among all these crimes “Rape” is one of the most disgusting crime, and unfortunately severely under-reported crime with showing dark figures of up to 91.6%.  A united state nation report shows more than 250,000 cases of rape or attempted rape were recorded by police annually. The report data covers 65 countries.

Apart from this data punishment for rape is different in different countries. And as usual, it takes time. Yearlong running cases, corruption, and false evidence always provide an opportunity to a rapist to escape from their assaults. And as a normal people, we always had a sense of guilt inside our heart. We just sympathise for a victim and her family for a moment and then get back to our normal routine life. But most of the time we wished that the rapist should get an instant and most intolerable punishment.

Here the exact thing happened. It was a routine weekend and I was surfing the internet, and suddenly this news has driven my attention instantly. The incidence of  ,A 17 year old girl cuts the penis of rapist during rape attempts has started a new chapter in the history of rapist punishment.
This incidence took place last evening when the girl had gone to relieve herself at a jungle in in choli area. The girl has snatched the knife from the accused raees when he attempts to force himself on her. She has attacked his private parts with it.

Police said that they have registered a case against the man after a complaint by the girl. The villagers arrived at the spot after hearing his cries and admitted him to a hospital, where his condition is stated to be serious.

Unfortunately, media is not supporting it as an incidence of bravery because of some political pressure, but as a woman and a normal citizen make us feel appreciate for this little girl, who shows an incredible courage and bravery for her fight.

Apart from laws and punishments, “Preventing sexual assaults” is one of the most important but ignored the aspect of our society. We always talk about self-defence tools for girls, but how seriously they are executing in our country, we do not know exactly. Indeed, the government should start a mandatory self-defense course in the school curriculum for safety and well-being of our girls.
What, how and when it will happen? We cannot say, but this time this girl has set a unique example of self-defence by doing the rarest thing. She has done what she can do. I salute her courage and bravery, what you say? Please share!